I feel like a double post, like as if there is a two headed entity within, each with an opinion that needs to be heard.

This post will focus on what the previous post was meant to (no not the apprehension, frustration and confusion) but rather the lack of enthusiasm.

I want to be more excited about university. It is suppose to be a time of oppurtunity but the more I think about it, the more it seems as if university sounds the death knell of oppurtunity.

When ending my secondary school years, I wanted to go to a school surrounded by my friends because I felt that JC was tough if you had to make friends all over again. For uni, I thought, what the heck, make new friends, have fun and at some point get a degree. It seems at least at first glance that I can't escape my past and I am bringing it along in bucketloads. The promise of a vaguely different life, which is what I need to get myself out of a some precieved rut I have placed myself in, seems too unlikely to believe.

Its hard to explain the rest and I am tired so maybe in a future post.